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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 1, 2012 12:14:56 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] there was only one person in the world that could drive effy blunt batshit crazy, and that one person happened to not be a person at all. not human, anyway. marek bishop was a vampire, the one who relied on her blood for his well-being. a poor choice, if you asked anyone who knew them both. effy herself was a very unhealthy sort of girl, always getting sick or getting herself into trouble. on the same note, she was as stubborn as a mule. unfortunately, so was bishop.
and so the two would constantly bicker and shoot words of both care and disdain toward each other. their relationship was a hectic one, full of confusing and conflicting thoughts and words and feelings. none of which ever seemed to be fully addressed. all of these memories and ideas left effy seething, laying on her back on the old and decrepid bed of hers. her hands were at her sides, clenching fists, sheets between her fingers. her blue eyes burned like star fire, staring at the ceiling as if she were trying to quite literally melt holes in the drywall. her hair lay splayed out around her, combed but not neatened. her layers had gotten long, her bangs falling over her eyes and the lot of her locks were ragged at the tips, having been cut badly to begin with. not that effy really gave a damn.
closing her eyes, she tried to relax, the muscles in her shoulders relinquishing their tension and her fists opening, letting the sheets fall back to the mattress, clinging to it in fear of being grabbed once more. she parted her lips in a loud sigh, exhaling her frustrations into the air and letting them disperse- away from her mind and away from her nagging thoughts. it was then that she began to doze off, letting her mind wander into a world that was full of anything but reality. the scowl on her face melted into a serene look, and her head fell to the side. that was always something effy was proud to be able to do, fall asleep at the drop of a dime. one minute she was awake with a whirlwind of fears and angry notions, and the next she was peacefully unconscious, letting the world fade around her.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 1, 2012 13:04:04 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 622 The Notes wassup. The other night had been hectic to say the least. A calm beginning was always a sure start to a sour end when it came to the likes of Effy Blunt and Marek Bishop. It seemed that whenever the two of them were together chaos was to ensue. Both of them were guarded and stubborn which apparently made for an unlikeable combination seeing as all that they could do was argue. Actually, that was not completely true. They didn’t always argue. Sometimes they actually managed to see things eye to eye or just passively accepted the other. But that had not been what had happened the other night. An interesting flurry of words had been shared and Bishop could not seem to get his mind from it. Effy’s words had haunted him from the moment that she had spoken them. It was the last thing that he had wanted to come out of their relationship. The last thing he had wanted was for his donor to have feelings for him. Even worse, he had not wanted to even think for a second that he could return those feelings to her. He couldn’t let this night pass without going to see Effy.
Bishop walked toward Effy’s home. It was a path he had already learned by heart considering the few times he had brought her here. His eyes shifted toward people coming and going, many of them casting him wary looks. Bishop looked right back at them, though the hood from his sweater was pulled over his head and he doubted that they could see green eyes beneath the shadow of night and the cover of his clothing. He was not looking to gain any attention though. He wasn’t bothered with the thought of pulling one of these idiots to the side and putting his fangs to an obvious vein in their arms. His concentration was set forward in the direction of the home he was searching for. When he did finally come to it, he had lost the attention of many of the people. But now that he stood at the door he was not sure whether he would be knocking or just walking right in. The last few times the door had been open. How else would he have gotten inside? Perhaps the Blunt’s really weren’t so worried for the safety of their possessions. Maybe Effy really did not care for her home. The vampire put his hand around the doorknob and felt it turn easily under his grip. It was unlocked and he stepped inside, though he made note to lock the door behind him.
The house was a mess as it usually was. This did not concern Bishop too much though and he simply stepped over anything that was in his way. It wasn’t as though as he had walked into a hoarder’s domain so he could at least get through. His eyes stayed on the floor until he found himself at the threshold to her bedroom. He stopped in the doorframe, eyes wandering immediately to the form that lay asleep on the bed under the patched up quilt. For a moment he thought of leaving her alone and going back outside. The thought was fleeting though and Bishop was soon stepping over magazines to make his way over toward the wall nearest her bed. He leaned against it, simply watching her for the moment.
After he had tired of waiting for her he decided to lean forward over her to disrupt the steady breathing. A pale hand reached out to her forehead, moving aside the shaggy brunette bangs away from her face, he then absently began to tap on her forehead hoping to rouse her from her sleep. |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 1, 2012 14:01:14 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] she dreamed she was far away. not in the sense of space but of time. she dreamed she was a child again, and it was questionable whether or not this was a figment of her imagination ir simply a memory she had unknowingly called upon. it took place here, in this home. her father had been there for once, and he greeted her at the door with a hug. he had to bend down, and she squealed and began chattering in a way only a little kid would. she continued to chatter as she followed him into the kitchen, but stopped dead in the threshold. her father wasn't there. instead, the bag of groceries he had been holding lay spilled on the floor, and there was red. red everywhere.
it was on the walls and on the floor, on the stove and on the window. it was even on the makeshift fold out table they ate dinner on. effy went to take a step back, but found that she couldn't. even in her childish form, she was quick. whipping around she found herself facing a pair of legs. her eyes followed them up, up, up. but they never reached his face. her little lips had parted in a scream that echoed into reality- in the form of silent fear. her muscles tensed, her lips parting as if she were trying to scream, but no sound came out. and then her eyes opened, blue depths shivering with the ice the dream left her with- and now she was sure. that was no memory. that could not have been a memory.
she expected to wake up to be alone again, her dream subsiding slowly as she looked at magazines. instead, though, her eyes opened to face a palm, a hand rhythmatically tapping her forehead. she should have been scared, of course. a stranger in her home, waking her up. the thing was- this was no stranger. the odd feeling of coolness emanating from the hand told her that this was none other than bishop, the very source of all her troubles lately. her dream vanished like dew in the morning sun, and her hand reached up, folding around his and removing it from her face. she made no effort to sit up, but simply stared at him, his jade green eyes neutral and thoughtful, through narrowed eyes. "bishop. what are you doing here?" she asked, her tone neither unfriendly nor all too welcoming either. it was suspicious, wary, careful. for once.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 1, 2012 22:08:11 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 624 The Notes wassup. Bishop waited silently. If there was one thing that his time on this earth had granted him it was an enormous amount of patience. His figure stayed hunched over the young woman sleeping in her bed and his fingers continued to drum ever so softly against her forehead all the while his eyes watched her face carefully. Beneath her tired eyelids he could see that she was very possibly already in a deep slumber, for her eyes could be noticed shifting beneath the skin. She was dreaming, Bishop decided. He slowed the tapping of his fingers, wondering if that had stirred something in her. However, when she continued on with the movement, he continued to let his fingers lightly dance over her skin wanting to wake her up. Now he only hoped that she wouldn’t come flying out of bed from some nightmarish vision in her head and want to try and snap his fingers back over his knuckles. Fortunately, Effy wasn’t very strong and Bishop was pretty confident in his ability to get out of harm’s way if harm decided to try and show itself.
When her deep blue stare finally snapped wide open Bishop stopped his fingers from their little dance and stared waiting for her mind to catch up with the scene. She pushed his hand away, calmly, and Bishop was then reassured that she was fully conscience and aware that he was there. The vampire straightened then, taking a step away from her to allow her some space if she desired it. The woman stayed laying in her bed but he could not denying the intense stare that always seemed to be following him whenever he was around her. He grinned though when she spoke his name and asked her question. The blue hood was then pushed back away from his head as though confirming that it was indeed him hiding beneath it.
“Cheery to see me?” he questioned her, obvious sarcasm in his voice but a grin softened it a bit. “Usually you’re the one seeking me out but here you are sleeping the night away. That is not a usual thing for you to do.” The vampire cocked his head, as if thoroughly puzzled to why she had decided to sleep rather than go out on her usual nighttime adventures. She always seemed fond of wandering the streets after the sun had slipped away from sight.
When Effy still remained on her bed Bishop decided to take back the foot or so that he had put between them. Now he looked back down at her though this time he remained standing straight. He still regarded her with curious features but they were a farce. Truly, he was not so curious to why she was sleeping instead of wandering around. It wasn’t as though he and Effy met every single night but rather every now and then. Sometimes they just happened to stumble upon one another, like the other night. The thought of the other night left a bitter taste in the back of his throat reminding him of his business here at Effy’s home. He wondered more than briefly whether or not the words she had shared with him that night hung as heavy on her conscience as they seemed to his. It was rather annoying actually. Every time the memories came back to him he felt his stomach tighten and he could not help but grimace. In truth, he was not certain what he should have thought about what had happened between them that night. But he was going to try and figure that out tonight. He would not have this looming over his head.
“Your door was open,” he stated suddenly, bluntly. “Did you know that?” |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 1, 2012 22:21:26 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] bishop backed away, taking a step back from her once he was sure she was awake. effy stared hard at him, trying to gauge his purpose there, trying to see what he wanted. he may have been thirsty, but in that case he would have texted her. peering over to her phone, lying limp on the bed beside her, she saw that no such texts or missed calls existed. she frowned for a moment, then turned her head back, her gaze shifting to focus once more upon the vampire that caused her so much inward strife. she listened to his voice, the sarcasm clear but the concern a little less so. maybe it was her distrust of him causing that, though.
she yawned, stretching her arms over her head and running her fingers along the wall before letting them lay slack, blinking at the dark haired creature of the night. "you're right, it's not." she replied with a half-hearted shrug. "i guess i was just tired." she added shortly, but not curtly, as a way of explanation. her lips curled upward in a small grin, only prompted by his own, and she let a soft sigh escape between her teeth. his presence brought her back to the night before, the argument and the words lashing in the air. she could feel it all over again, the tightness in her chest that suffocated her, and the rage whirring in her mind like cogs moving too fast. she swallowed the lump rising in her throat, her gaze dropping from his to stare at the ceiling, letting the silence fall.
he spoke again, abruptly and sharply. her gaze drifted lazily to him and flashed before snapping back to the ceiling. "of course i know. it always is." she replied. this itself was true. the blunt's did not own many things and therefore had nothing to protect. they also had very little enemies, but at the same time in any town it was foolish to leave your door open, unlocked to the world. perhaps that was the little bit of effy that was self destructive. if someone walked in on her and shot her- well, that would have been alright. she didn't ask for it nor did she go looking for it. it was something that just happened. still, that was unlikely. despite her humble abode, she was not residing in a crime-infested area. without looking back at bishop, she felt her lips part to speak, the words flowing before she had a chance to stop them. "why did you come?"
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 1, 2012 23:15:27 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 614 The Notes wassup. It was difficult to hide the interest and curiosity in his eyes. If Bishop had not been such a careful user with his words then he would have certainly sprung upon the girl a thousand questions having to do with the other night! His lips held fast though and he allowed her some time to think and react to his being there in the first place. If it had been someone coming into his home and suddenly watching him sleep he would have expected the same treatment if they had not already attempted to decapitate him or put a stake through his heart. Still, he watched Effy and tried to carefully consider her words in his own mind over and over again before saying anything about why he was here. He wanted to be sure to put such a delicate subject out with… well delicacy. Her emotions had taken him sincerely by surprise the other night and even if he had somewhat taunted the poor thing he wanted to prove now that he had no interest in doing that on this night. He had gotten over his own emotions now and was ready to rationally discuss things. At least, he was pretty sure he had come mentally and emotionally prepared. Effy was not unknown for throwing some curve balls at him.
For some reason it bothered him greatly that she always left the doors unlock. Bishop was constantly locking his own door (and sometimes others) simply out habit. He had grown up in a time at the end of a war and his foster parents had a constant fear that someone was going to come for them because of Bishop. Well, technically, because of Marek Elliot. Bishop’s last name was not truly his own and the name he so commonly went by had actually been the surname of the family who had taken him in as an infant. He wasn’t sure why he clung to it considering he never really felt connected with them. But he supposed it was the only form of identity that he had since he’d never known his true parents or family. They had been taken from this life, he was sure, before the end of the war.
Finally the inevitable had come. She wanted to know why he had come here. Something told him that she must have already known the answer to that. She must have already seen some hints as to why he had troubled himself with coming to her home. But Bishop could not confirm this since she did not say anything that tipped that she understood his reason for being here. He was left to assume he was bringing the topic up out of the blue, an uncomfortable thing to do.
He remained silent at first, trying to find the right words to put together. He wanted to coat it with his stoic cynicism but knew that would only end in disaster. Bishop had to be straightforward if he wanted anything to come out of this conversation, no matter how strange it would be for either of them. There were just some things that absolutely had to be addressed.
“Last night,” he started, speaking the words slowly while his own stare drifted from her and up toward the ceiling. “You said some things that I cannot ignore. I’d like to know how much truth they held and how much of it was simply emotions caught in the moment.” He looked back down to her, eyeing her carefully and calmly. “I need to know. It is important that we –that I decide on a course of action. I don’t know how to feel about it yet.” |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 2, 2012 0:01:55 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] his words were the ones she expected to hear, even if put more formally than she could have imagined in her own mind. she watched in silence as he spoke, very carefully and very delicately. his tone of voice was almost cautious, and effy felt her eyes narrowing as he spoke, her muscles involunarily clenching and her shoulders rising. she pushed herself into a sitting position, facing him and his words and his stormy green eyes.
she crossed her legs and held her ankles with her arms, slouching slightly but still keeping her chin lifted and her gaze focused intently on bishop's. she sniffed, reaching up to rub the tip of her nose as she thought of how to reply. he had caused her pain last night, whether he was aware of it or not. she was a lot of things, effy was, but she had never really been an in-the-moment type of person. she supposed he could not know any different, he had not known her long enough to notice her behavioral patterns. she pursed her lips before replying, taking a deep breath to prepare herself for the words she knew she had to say, but dreaded despite the fact.
"oh really?" she asked sarcastically, trying to poke and prod him so he had a feeling of what she had felt the night before. she would have continued her brigade, but she held back. it would be unfair to do that, she had learned two wrongs never made a right. still, the rebellious words leaped through her mind, although she had a mind to bite her tongue to keep from indulging her hurt further. she leaned back slightly, watching his gaze drift upward to the ceiling, his discomfort and dread of this conversation clear in both his tone of voice and his body language. effy felt a pang of guilt for starting off so ... coolly. she picked up her actions instead by turning the tables and giving herself a more or less accepting and relaxed air. "what i said last night was true. i do fancy you, and the only in-the-moment emotion was anger." she replied calmly, blinking her solid blue eyes and allowing them to also drift, facing the ground rather than the ceiling by the time she had finished speaking. "decide what you will." the last words she spoke were rather curt, but she couldn't help herself from speaking them, letting them escape her lips.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 2, 2012 0:29:30 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 619 The Notes wassup. She was a difficult one, this Effy Blunt. If Bishop had not endured a hundred years of listening to people berate him at random then he probably would have flinched at her tone of voice. He took it in stride though, knowing full well that he had only brought it upon himself because of what had happened last night. He would have liked to defend himself but found no excuses to be worth mentioning. He deserved to feel the guilt swell up at the center of his chest. Still, Bishop could not bring himself to share the emotion openly with her or even bring it up in conversation. He held his tongue.
How could it be? How did it even come to be? How had this young woman, so rough and tumble around the edges come to have interest in him? How could she have developed an interest that went beyond being his donor? This was one of the things that he had tried to be sure did not happen. It seemed a rare occasion for a vampire or a donor to have feelings for one or the other. It was even rarer that the pair would end up sharing the same feelings! There was good reason for it to, he was sure. He had strictly hired her to draw blood from her and nothing more. She had been hired with little regard for her even being a human being. There wasn’t supposed to be a relationship and how could there be? How could you feel for someone who only wanted to feed off of your life blood? It truly did baffle him. Bishop had never been romantic, he had never said anything to try and woo her. So how had these feelings in the woman come to be? She had his mind buzzing with questions by now.
It was possible that Bishop needed to stop and consider himself before he tried to figure her out. He needed to take those questions and ask them about himself. Not long ago he had openly scoffed at the idea of developing any kind of feelings toward a donor (or anyone for that matter). Alas, here he was with a tight knot in his stomach because he couldn’t quite place his own feelings… feelings that were not supposed to even exist. When had he started to feel anything for her, he could not help but wonder about it. It made sense why it was so difficult to bring up now though. There was something there, even if he couldn’t place an exact finger on it.
Bishop still watched her keeping his cool on the outside despite the many insecurities that were starting to spawn inside. She seemed just as levelheaded now. The situation probably looked like it was in perfect control. But, Bishop didn’t know about Effy, he was feeling like things were completely out of his control. It was a terrible feeling too. All he could do was shake his head and look back out toward the hall that had led him to her room.
“It is not wise to have feelings for a vampire,” he spoke with a sigh. “Especially when that vampire is me.” He was mostly saying this because of what she was to him: a donor. He wanted to think maybe she felt these things because they had been seeing each other often enough or perhaps because they could carry light and meaningful conversations sometimes. But he didn’t know –couldn’t know – why she felt the way that she did. That was for her to decide. He knew that now.
A bitter grin appeared on his lips. “It is unfortunate that you were not born a hundred years earlier.” |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 2, 2012 6:42:15 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] so many emotions flickered through bishop's eyes, not one of them easy to decipher nor easy to handle if she had figured them out. he had questions, she could tell, and was nearly bursting at the seams with them. she herself had many of her own- she wondered why she felt the way she did all the time. there was nothing particularly special about this vampire. he was mule-headed and tempermental, distant and isolated. but he had an underlying demeanor, she guessed, that she saw past anything else he tried to put on for show. at the same time though, she tried desperately to gauge his reaction. what did this mean to him, were those feelings returned? did he feel an emptiness in his chest that would constrict hers if she knew?
her mind whirred like broken cogs, and she forced down the speed and pitch of her thoughts, calming her head and her nerves all at once. when he spoke, she had to keep herself quiet for a long moment, let herself digest his words and give herself time to think before bursting out with a reply she knew she would regret. she was hardly angry anymore, the rebellious need to get even quenched by the graveness of tonight's conversation. "of course it isn't wise." she said quietly, offering a light shrug of her shoulders. "but that can't be helped, now can it?" her voice had dropped even lower in tone, and she knew very well the consequences of her feelings and everything that could mean in the future. it was something she had struggled with before, and ended up wearing herself out because of it.
a small grin, brittle and lackluster, played at her lips. "it is unfortunate that you were not born one hundred years later." she countered, her blue eyes dark with the thoughts of her future, his future, everything in between. she was human, and more than that she was a donor. she couldn't possibly begin to comprehend the meaning of that when it came down to the core of it all. she did know one thing, however. this would get sorted out before he left tonight- and that was that. there was no argument in her mind and she was sure there wasn't one in his either.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 2, 2012 10:08:01 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 503 The Notes wassup. How? That was the biggest question that continued to daunt him. It seemed impossible for his mind to wrap around how someone could decide that they had feelings for him. How could someone have decided that they liked what he kept himself hidden in? It didn’t seem possible to love a shell of a person. That may have been Bishop assuming he was unbreakable however. On more than one occasion he had decided that Effy had annoyingly accurate insight. She was ever the intuitive young woman and could often see right beyond the charades that he put up before her. The only time when he managed to slip by her thoughtfulness was when he managed to get her off guard or while she was feeling flustered. A thought crossed him though. What if, perhaps, the reason she could see through him was because she was somewhat like himself? There was no denying that they were both stubborn (Effy more so, he decided) and they both did not allow weaknesses to slip through. Maybe that was what had pulled them together by accident. Bishop had tried to push away and the always stubborn Effy was always one to push forward. He supposed this was… inevitable.
With his dark brows furrowed, Bishop turned his eyes back over toward the young woman. She was right. It could no longer be helped, not unless the feelings were indeed fleeting and soon faded. It had to have been some stubborn feelings to like the likes of him, though. Not only because Bishop was a bit rough around the edges but because his own hardheadedness was eager to try and deny her feelings altogether. That was his biggest problem too. They were Effy Blunt’s feelings and not his own. He could not control the feelings of others, especially Effy’s.
What would things have been like for him if he had been born in this time? How different his life could have been. Perhaps both of his parents, whoever they were, would have still been alive. They may have prospered in this world. Unfortunately, they had been alive in a time when there had been enough hate against them to end their lives and almost Bishop’s. But, then again, there had been many times that Bishop should have perished into the curious blackness of death and had not. He was far too stubborn… or lucky, he decided.
His hands fell into his jean pockets then. “That is not the case,” he replied at length, a grin still lingering from the dire thought. Effy would not have enjoyed him in his youth. He had been something short of miserable and maybe as reckless as her in his own way. It would have been a terrible relationship between the pair. Two self-destructive young humans deciding they had nothing left to lose… or would it have been something different? Would they both have been different people? He didn’t know- couldn’t know.
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 2, 2012 11:03:48 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] if she had been born one hundred years ago. the thought struck her, about as subtle as a brick in her back. she had remembered her history classes, the times that bishop had been born into. she was quite sure that she didn't want to be born in the past, given the way things had been. but at the same time, what did she really have keeping her here? there was nothing, no one. she supposed that it would not have been much different one hundred years ago. in fact, she would be surprised if it was. blinking, her blue eyes drifted around the messy room, magazines scattered along the floor and her vanity covered with old makeup and lotions and trinkets, all reminders of the girl she was despite her rugged exterior.
her gaze flickered back to bishop as he spoke, the ghost of his grin still plastered to his face, his lips still turned upward at the corners. bishop was a lot like her. he was stubborn and always played himself off in a way that lead others to believe he was something other than what he was, something worse. she could tell by the haunting look in his eyes that he had once been self-destructive, a hurricane turning inward. she was much the same way- neither of them had anything left to lose. but years had given bishop a sense of patience and toned him down. underneath it all, though, he was still the same reckless boy he had been in his youth as a human.
that is not the case. oh, but if it was! effy couldn't fathom the idea of a chance occurrance like that ever happening. no, she would not have been that lucky. when bishop spoke once more, his words sparked a heaviness in her chest that weighed her down like lead in water. she felt herself drowning in thoughts and emotions so jumbled she would be amazed if she could sort through any of them. "it's not about what i want." she pointed out, pursing her lips as she did so. it was a mistake the bishop often made, as if his feelings were directly related to someone else's, as if he had none of his own and could not stand to come up with any without leaning on someone else. but, she figured she'd humor him. "of course if i had a choice in the matter i would want you to react positively to the situation." she said this as if there were no other option. for once she didn't want to destroy herself.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 2, 2012 12:11:02 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 542 The Notes wassup. She wanted a positive reaction from it. Even Bishop, as unfeeling as he tried to be, could understand that and probably could have guessed the vague answer. Anyone would want a positive reaction when it held something as delicate as these emotions. By sharing with him her feelings she had opened up a little bit of herself and it made sense that she did not want him to turn her feelings away. It had more than likely been the reason for her not sharing them with him. For once, she may have been afraid of hurting herself. That was why she had been so avid in not giving herself away when he had tried poking fun at her. Bishop was not stupid. His years dealing with humans and himself made many emotions stand out to him before words had to confirm him. He felt guilty, then, for dragging things out like he had just so that he could hear her say what she felt. He knew he would not have liked the treatment. He knew he would have been just as stubborn about giving in. Maybe even just as scared as she was about revealing feelings that could be so fragile. But he was.
He could feel it, though he tried madly not to, that he had indeed found himself capable of fear. Even against the very words he had said to her before, for he felt himself afraid for someone else but still not himself. Bishop was selfish and he knew that sharing your care with someone and then throwing your life away was a selfish thing to do. It would hurt the other person if they felt for you too. It would break them as much to see you falling apart as you felt doing so. That was the funny thing about falling in love with someone, he supposed. He’d seen it played out by different people through the decades. He had seen all the pain one went through when they gave into their feelings and put their trust in others.
That was what he feared. All of his life he had kept himself so very well protected from other people’s feelings and even his own. He had numbed his with dangerous substances and kept others out by being emotionally undesirable. Who knew that sixty or so years into the future all of that would be questioned when he had taken a donor? Who could have ever known that this scrawny woman could have braved the stoic appearance of Marek Bishop? He would have never expected that she would make him so curious of what was beyond her exterior. He wasn’t sure if he could do it. He felt already so far gone when he thought about it. But moments like this made him feel like a change was right at the tips of his fingers, a horrifying but curious change.
“And what would be the positive way to react,” he question as much as simply stated. He may not have ever run into a situation such as this one… but he could still feel that he knew the proper way to react. He also knew that Effy may soon find herself surprised, just as surprised as he was actually. |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 2, 2012 13:18:04 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] long hours of practice had given her a hard shell. years of neglect had left her shrouded in a darkness of her own creation. she liked it there, because being unable to see meant that all the evil and ugly in the world was all she was blind to. and blind to her, so she hoped. recently, though, the ugly in the world had found her, searched her out and ripped at her until she was left with bruises and scars. but for some strange reason standing right in front of her now, the shroud was dissipating. sure, the world was still ugly- but she could see it. she could prepare for it and fear what it had coming. some ripped off her eyelids and forced her to see everything she had tried so hard to ignore before.
so the moment hanging between bishop and effy stretched in time, stretching for what seemed like forever. they both sat in a thoughtful, tense silence. they were on the edge of a cliff, their toes hanging off and the wind pushing into their backs. they could jump off, or they could turn around. either way was forever, and either way could make or break them both. they were both at the most vulnerable point in their lives, eyes wide with the realization of this. effy herself felt her heart pounding in her chest, a set of drums beating heavily in rhythm. she tried to calm it, but to no avail. pound it did, and she could hear it roaring in her ears, though she was sure it did not echo past that.
bishop spoke, his words recited with quiet clarity. she peered at him for a moment and blinked blue eyes that churned and swirled, a mirror to the chaos melting in her mind. it was erratic and hectic and everything was all over the place. somehow, though, effy managed to part her lips, uttering a few words that made some sense of the mess inside her. "you know what that means, bishop. to be able to reciprocate." her words were a stark contrast to her inward battle, clear and silky smooth, calm. this was opposed to the raging everything she was suffering. and she waited, feeling as if she were closer to the edge of the cliff than she ever had been before.
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Post by marek elliot bishop on Feb 2, 2012 22:56:37 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: dddddd; border: #cccccc solid 8px; width: 420px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] DEAD STAR SHINE LIGHT UP THE SKY I'M ALL OUT OF BREATH The Outfit: oh la la. The Words: 541 The Notes wassup. A pale hand reached up and rubbed his temple when she gave him a reply. Even though he still managed to keep a headache at bay the situation still brought enough stress on him to want to do nothing but hide his eyes for the moment. Her stare was always so deep and intense; his eyes needed a break from all of it. Not to mention Bishop simply did not want to follow through with any kind of word or action. He felt like he needed some kind of confirmation and opinion to get him to do anything. He was so used to having people tell him what they wanted rather than them saying to chose what it was that he really wanted. In fact, he was so used to it that he found he wasn’t really sure what he wanted to do because he wasn’t sure what really was right. In his mind, he had already decided that being any more than Effy’s boss (or whatever it was he would be considered in their donor/vampire relationship. Pushing the boundaries would be a dangerous thing, he was certain. Even more dangerous than simply having her around. It would be putting his emotions at risk and opening up a vulnerable spot. Perhaps more than one vulnerable spot! Bishop wasn’t one who wanted to be emotionally vulnerable. But, he realized, neither was Effy.
The hand dropped away and the placid stare returned to the brunette. With both hands now at his sides he pushed away from the wall and took a few slow steps over toward the bed. The green eyes never moved away from hers, she had his complete attention as she very often did. As he approached the unmade bed he turned his body slightly so that he could sit at its edge. Now seated, he released an obvious sigh with his eyebrows rising and a face that was almost asking for her to fill in the silence between them. He knew no words would come though. Her mind seemed set.
“You realize this is the last thing that I had wanted to happen between us?” he questioned, for what felt like the hundredth time in his mind. Then he frowned slightly, but more for effective than letting his true feelings shining through. “You are human. You will grow old, I will not.” It was some form of denial, he supposed, but also the truth. If the two of them decided to take the route to acknowledge their feelings then surely it would end badly and Bishop would once again be left alone. The thought stung and he tried everything he could to keep it from showing on his face. He wasn’t sure how well he would handle the death of someone while knowing that his existence would be eternal unless someone took his life from him. He knew there was a way to completely avoid this though but that option was not one he would consider right now (or hopefully ever). The thought of Effy being changed… it wouldn’t sit well with either of them right now. He hoped it wouldn’t for her because Bishop would not change her.
He gave her a look of resolve then. “I do care.” |
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Post by effy katherine blunt on Feb 2, 2012 23:38:58 GMT -6
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-image:url(http://i54.tinypic.com/2vafwqd.jpg), border: solid #ffffff 5px; width: 400px; height: 500px;] well no shit. effy thought when bishop spoke. she had watched him cover his eyes, rubbing his temples in a paralyzing thought process. she knew it was paralyzing because she was there too, suffering the same clenching of her chest and dragging of her stomach. her mind was still whirling in a frenzy, but she was still able to keep it at bay, keep her lips from parting and saying all the things she had been trying very hard to shield. even still, her eyes mirrored her thoughts, flashing and glimmering and glazing all at the same time, a rainbow of unspoken words.
he was right. he would live forever, he was eternal. she was not, and she had an expiration date as clear as the ones printed on milk bottles. perhaps hers was sooner than later, or perhaps not. no one could tell these things, and effy herself least of all. she had pushed herself to the brink so many times and came out standing, and this made her think she was nearly indestructable despite her best efforts. but she wasn't, and she knew this. one day death's hand would curl around her feeble body and whisk her breath away with it's departure. she would leave bishop alone in a world she knew they both hated.
but the thought of the alternative made chills run down her spine. to loose her humanity, to loose her mortality. it was a curse, and she knew it. but at the same time it may work for her, in a situation such as this. she could only imagine the burden, though, that being a vampire brought. the blood, the parasitic need, and everything in between. she would never walk in the sun again. she blinked slowly, considering this and taking the thoughts deep into her heart. she let them fill the corners and contract and swell with the beats of her pulse. she knew she would get used to it, but she also knew that it was a change that she wasn't going to willingly walk into. besides, she knew bishop would be the last vampire to turn her.
so she said nothing for awhile, letting the reality of the affections stirring inside her lay on her like lead. his last three words echoed in her ears, ringing like a gunshot let off too soon. or too late. her eyes snapped up to meet his, gleaming with all the happiness that filled her but glittering with all the fear of what that could mean. "i'm glad." she offered a small smile, trying to hide the dread of the future, of aging, of everything that it meant to be human. she shoved it down, knowing that now was not the time to bring it up. They had time, for now.
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